I am thankful for you

We love Him because He first loved us.  1 John 4:19

Last night I had a special guest for dinner.  She’s been with me a few days and I’ve been blessed.  A darling diminutive woman in her 90’s, she has graced me with much wisdom and simplicity in discussing His Word (2 Cor 3:12; 11:3-4)

As she and I have had sweet opportunities to dine on His Word, I have also tried to feed her with good things (Feed His sheep you know? 🙂 . 

Two of my daughters, my son-in-law, my youngest son and my two granddaughters were also there for dinner last night — and as usual, it was a fun – yet tiring melee.

The day before I had soaked Navy beans, and that night I put them in my big crock pot along with the ham hocks, onions and diced carrots.  A little chicken base and set them on low.  Wonderful smell wafted through the house later as they slowly simmered.

In the morning, Jason mentioned there was something sticky on the floor, and thankfully he kindly started to mop while my beloved friend and I sipped coffee.  As we were chatting, I heard a dripping noise, and got up to see a puddle on the counter, which was seeping down the range crack into one of my pot cabinets.  So mopping, emptying cabinets and pot washing was added to my typical Lucy day.  

Shortly thereafter we discussed this verse, and the Lord seemed to confirm it later by bringing up an old memory verse as a FB memory that I had made back in early 2011.

A man’s heart plans his way, But the Lord directs his steps.  Proverbs 16:9

Back to the mess which I had not planned.   

I silently prayed (and heard some songs in my mind) as my husband and I set to cleaning up. Humming them helps… 🙂 After all that, I re-started the beans in a large pot on the stove (instead of my now defunct slow cooker). I decided I wouldn’t make the complete clean up a big project, but just do a little here and a little there.  

Then the sink clogged up…Maybe some of the carrots I had peeled for the soup. My poor husband had to get down on the ground to get in the sink to take it apart (after trying other things). With what he is going through physically, it made me feel badly that I hadn’t made all the pieces of carrots chunks to the garbage. But my husband didn’t make me feel that way. Even more so, the Lord doesn’t either. Even in chastening He assures me I am His legitimate child.

Later I made some buttermilk cornbread with onion bits and jalapenos on one side (a trial which worked well). I softened some butter in preparation.  Diced some sweet onions and got out what we needed for dinner as I listened to the chatter swirl around me. (I’m not trying to be too clever with words, it’s just me trying to express it how I felt it). 

Once we were able to finally sit, I was warmed that my treasured guest had a second bowl. Made me smile, my goal (people tell me) tends to be to fatten most people up. I’m afraid it may backfire on me though. 🙂

After dinner, we sat amidst the non-stop chatter of my little (and bigger) girls, while the old movie ‘Little Women’ played in the background. We had been out visiting on the back patio for awhile before dinner. I was able to pop in and out, the last time waiting for the cornbread to finish resting in its cast iron skillet. After dinner the door was still open with the night air cooling (and scenting) the room. We didn’t finish the movie due to being tired, but the fond memories and sentiments expressed were sweet throughout. 

After the kids left, I somewhat slowly limped back to my bedroom in deep thought. Jason had already retired to watch the taped news. My legs were sore from walking, standing and just generally being on a hard floor for a long time. But if not for that inconsequential pain, I probably wouldn’t have appreciated (ever so much) the soft bed, smooth cool sheets and overall comfort of having my body fade into rest. I thought to myself (smiling) how grateful I was for all I had. My mind flitted momentarily to some of the unhappiness I’ve experienced lately. But still — I thought if I died last night, how thankful and content I had been as a caretaker of the Lord for what He has blessed me with. Not just in my wonderful home, but with my family and those who love me (even though I may not deserve it). I haven’t often done a good job with what He’s given me, but I do pray that more often I can do it His way for as long as I have left on this earth. Time is short we all know.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.  For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also abounds through Christ.  2 Cor 1:3-5

In having those particular thoughts last night, I also pondered those I’ve been blessed to fellowship with on FB — my online women’s Bible study, or those I’ve met on my website. I’ve experienced great wounds as well as great blessings. Tears and laughter.  I’ve met friends on my page who have sadly gotten into error (in my humble estimation) and most have divided from me (in anger) for saying so. This has been my portion, but I’m not complaining. In making anyone upset, I also know I can always do better (and hope to do so). But the ones who have not gotten upset with me have been tremendous consolation for the others. I still weep over the loss of fellowship for those I have known, and I love them, miss them and pray for them (if you are reading, you know who you are, but you may not know my feelings towards you).

FB frienemies

I also have made some FB frienemies. It only matters why if I’ve had a part in the matter. I hopefully can keep learning with His help to speak with grace and salt in my speech (Col 4:5-6), both to the unsaved and the saved. I’m human, so I can be weary, weak, or suffering at times from difficulties in my life, and in that, I can miss the mark. May the Lord bless my frienemies, and may He bring them to sound doctrine and peace in Him.

I also have seen a division in the world, and a division in the body over many things. We should have a desire to keep the big picture in mind in dealing with others. It’s not just about speaking the gospel to the lost, but about how we speak in front of them when we’re not.  (Do you know Him?)    Only you and the Lord can decide if you are doing what He wills for you there. 

Although we judge within the body of Christ, we have a dilemma in the fact many do not have a church home, and so the typical elders and structure just don’t exist. For whatever reason in misunderstandings on the Web, biting and devouring exists far too often. People don’t ask others if something is true. They don’t esteem others better than themselves. They may insist on their own way. Or they are uncomfortable in confrontations or even things others do which may make them stumble, and it’s easier for some to unfriend or block or even ignore (please don’t justify yourself to me, it’s again between you and Him). Whatever may be may the Lord bless them (and me) to be able to instead submit to Him, resist the enemy, and do the hard thing in humbling ourselves underneath His mighty hand, submitting to others in reverence and love for His Word (1 Peter 5).

Therefore if there is any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and mercy, fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.  Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.  Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.  Phil 2:1-4

I’ve also had many seriously flat out vicious enemies. The name calling, the unkindness or sheer hatred is palpable.  It’s shocking each time, but He told us it would be like this. May we be able to stop and bless our enemies and pray for them, remembering that He desires all should come to a knowledge of the truth (1 Tim 2:1-6), having been a ransom for each one, tasting death for them too (Heb 2:9; 1 John 2:2). 

So I thought on how thankful I am for what I’ve been blessed with online, even as hard as the internet has been. So many stories I could tell, with several times as many that I’ve forgotten (probably a good thing). Even in all of that — I am thankful. And grateful that He loves me in my weaknesses, (and I am weak, and I am tired). And so in turn, may I bear with another’s weakness with His help. And may I do it for Him, because He first loved me. 

I just want to tell you all that might be reading, that no matter what has transpired at any point between us, (or not) I am grateful for each one of you. My family, my friends, my frienemies and my enemies. In each story, each hurt, every sorrow — I have been blessed and will count it all joy. May the Lord be glorified in all. I will fail you, and I will fail Him, but He is faithful always.

Love in Christ, praying for you.

My flesh and my heart fail;
But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.