Day 32 and counting

This is what I wrote (and re-wrote to update the days) in a bi-fold brochure for other scared and grieving patient’s families in the hospital waiting rooms. I am very tired, so this may not be well done, and I am open to any help on something I may have missed. In Christ, Holly and Jason (by the way, Jason read it and said, “I am very, very glad you wrote this up”.)

Praying these hurting ones might seek the Lord, in the hope that they might grope for Him and find Him, though He is not far from each one of us… (from Acts 17:26)

From One who has a loved one here (at the hospital) also

Where will you go when you die?  That was a somber but serious question my husband Gilbert asked two friends of mine very shortly before he died. He cared enough for them to put that question before them, even though it angered one of them so much she never spoke to him again before he died. God loves you, and does not want you to spend eternity separated from Him, and neither do I — trust me. He cares, He is a God who stores our tears (Ps 56:8).

I’ve been in this hospital too many times for my age.  In fact I have been in so many different hospitals that I forget which hospital I’m in at times.

My father was in the same room in intensive care my first husband was in when he first got there. Then he got transferred to the fourth floor. When my dad was transferred out of intensive care somehow I knew down deep my dad would end up in the same corner room that my husband was in. He did.

My good friend died suddenly after my late husband. He was suddenly diagnosed with liver cancer that was hereditary. He was Chinese, adopted by some Vietnamese, who then became a refugee here as a young teen. He came to understand the good news and believed the day He died and went to heaven. The offer is still the same for all – eternal life.

Shortly after him, my other friend Nancy got sick, and I was called over to Scottsdale Hospital on Shea. She was only in her early 50’s, and she suddenly had a few days to live. I shared what she must believe in order to be saved and she believed and is now with the Lord, as she finally understood the simple truth of trusting in Him alone — then passed from this life a couple of days later.

My mom has two stage four forms of cancer. Treatable but not curable. But she is at peace knowing her future and who holds it. She is still vital and where she goes, (even in the recent loss of my dad), still shares with people the good news of salvation.

An elderly Jewish friend (86) trusted that Jesus was the Jewish Messiah, and that precious friend is with the Lord today — she believed upon Him as her Savior.

My son was in a really bad accident two years ago and has a traumatic brain injury. His life ahead of him on this earth doesn’t look too good. He can’t stand, or walk, or share much of his feelings. He loved his grandpa like a father and my dad wanted to see him, but the stroke he had just took its toll, along with a triple A aneurysm. My son Adam never saw him again, they were both in skilled nursing facilities at the same time (where my son still resides), but they both believe in Jesus Christ as their Savior and will be together again.

A year ago this October, my dad went to join all my friends and loved ones when he died. 2 Corinthians 5:8 says, “Absent from the body, he is present with the Lord.” Dad died a few short days after I remarried to my sweet husband who is here now — a man who has been a rock to our family in our grief.  My two youngest sons and I moved in last year to start a new life in a new house. Still we never know how long we have on this earth. Any day can be the day. Any moment we can take our last breath, as you red this, do you know Him as your Savior, or is He just another name to you?

Nor is there salvation in any other, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved. 

Acts 4:12                                             

God is near to the brokenhearted

So here I am once again with my new husband in this hospital for a month. He has pneumonia, valley fever, and a lung bleed which led to a serious surgery. We don’t know how much more we are facing, but we do know we can face tomorrow because Jesus Christ died and rose to life again, so that we too might live again eternally with Him.

When they brought us up from ER, suddenly I felt I knew that he would be given the room that my dad was put in when he had his stroke. And not only that but as it turned out, he was given the same bed. I was sick myself and barely moving well, but I wrote this hoping this could help just one person…So I decided maybe I should write this letter in the hopes that someone, (even one) who is hurting, afraid or grieving as they wait here might read this and believe upon Jesus.  God is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18). Know someone is praying for you – it might be someone besides me, or just another grieving person who is nothing except for the fact He saved me. And I write this even as I am worried and praying yet again for someone I love.

You never know if you are one of the ones I may pass in the hallway, I will be praying. I am sure others are praying for you too.  God desires no one should be separated from Him. He loves you and gave Himself for you, so that you could live eternally with Him. He doesn’t want you to be separated from Him, that was never His original intention.

I am praying for those I met, saw and talked to in the ER room. An elderly woman and her son, A mother with her children, a woman with chest pains, a homeless man. The harried woman who was taking the information, an exhausted nurse trying to deal with the crowd. The couple who watched my husband while I limped to go get my vehicle parked so far away.  A security guard who saw people in the door, the older gentleman watching in the hallway of the ER rooms. The nurses and attendants and phlebotomist who was “the best we would ever had” (in his own words). A kind doctor who took his time with us and tried to figure out what was wrong yet balancing his time because of the overload of sick patients. The man screaming out for pain meds, the woman so sick she didn’t know what to do. Our roommate who passed away after I was able to share a letter in Serbian with him (containing the good news of salvation). So many people thinking they will see tomorrow — all of them need Jesus Christ to save them. Every one of us need Him, but many will reject Him because of all the false information that is out there.

Have you ever thought, or has someone told you how much God loved you by sending Jesus to die for each one of our sins on the cross? (1 Cor. 15:3-4; Colossians 2:13). The Bible says the payment for sin is death and we have ALL sinned (Rom 3:23), especially me.  Someone had to die – Jesus showed His great love for us, by giving His life for us – payment in full. If only we would only put our faith in Him instead of the wrong thing. But so many trust in their own goodness, works or religion. Yet the Bible is clear, we cannot be saved by works.

Some of you may have faith in a particular religion. But if the Bible is true, (and there is much compelling evidence in the prophecies that have come true to verify this), then there is no other way but Jesus Christ alone. Nothing we can do save to believe upon Him as our Savior will earn us the free gift of eternal life (please look up Romans 3:23; 6:23; Ephesians 2:8-9, John 3:16-18; Rom 4:2-5; John 6:28-29)

Aren’t there many paths to God?

Man says there are many paths to God. Who are they and why do you believe them? Are you willing to gamble your very soul upon it?

Jesus said there is only one way and He is it (John 8:58; 14:6). Some call Him a good man, or a prophet. Others say He is a created being. He couldn’t have been any of those things or He was lying and not worth believing. He said He was God, the Bible says there was nothing made that was not made by Him, that all things were created by Him, and that He was there in the beginning with God. He said He was the great I Am, there before Abraham (John 8). And He warned unless we believed He was who He said He was, we would die in our sins.

Most people think they are probably good enough to get to heaven. But we have all sinned (Romans 3:23). God is perfect and His Word says not even one lie will enter this perfect place with God (Revelation 21:7). We’ve all fallen short of God’s Holiness — similar to missing the bullseye on a target. We have ALL missed the mark of God’s perfect standard. So what can we do to be saved?

God is just, and all sin will be judged. The penalty for disobeying an eternal God from the very beginning was eternal death in a place called hell. This is eternal separation from God in a terrible place. I’ve heard people joke about hell, but it is not a place anyone would want to be, it’s no joke. We tend to think of only the ‘big sins’ and figure if we haven’t done them, we’re ‘probably’ good. We’d rather not even consider death. But we all will die. God hates sin but He loves us, so He made a way for us to be saved from the very first sin.

Why did Jesus have to die? Man sinned, man had to die for that sin. Jesus came as fully God and also fully man to take that sentence for us. He never sinned in thought or deed. He was the perfect Lamb of God, who willingly came to offer Himself in our place. He Shed His blood, gave His life for us, and took our judgment if we will believe on Him.

Sin causes eternal death. The wages/penalty for our sin is eternal death or separation from God. That goes for all people no matter who they are or how good they are. There is a penalty and God is just. He cannot tolerate sin in His presence, nor allow it into a perfect place that will have no more sin, no more death, no more sorrow or tears.

The thing is, none of us are promised tomorrow. The Bible says it’s appointed unto man once to die, then the judgment. The Bible doesn’t teach Purgatory or soul sleep — but the judgment of God to all who reject His Son Jesus.

He who believes in the Son has everlasting life; and he who does not believe the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God abides on him. John 3:36

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for usRom 6:8

Most assuredly, I say to you, he who believes in Me has everlasting lifeJohn 6:47


There will be an end to sin once for all. It is what has caused the fall, death and sickness, and destruction in this world. Sin is why we get sick. God has offered a way, but if we reject the only way He has provided, we’ll be separated from Him forever.  God loves us and does not want that for any of us. The Bible say He desires that NONE should perish because He made us and loves us, but hates sin and it’s consequences for us.

God allowed us free will to believe Him or reject the truth. He does not force Himself upon us, wanting us to freely love Him (we can understand wanting someone to love us of their own accord). He shows His love for us in the many good things He has given us in life. The blessing of children, others who love us, even animals that we love. The beauty of creation all around us.  The Heavens and the earth declare His glory. There is nowhere it is not heard.

BUT I’M A GOOD PERSON!!  But the Bible tells us “All we like sheep have gone astray; We have turned, every one, to his own way; And the Lord has laid on Him (Jesus) the sin of us all.” (Isaiah.53:6) Romans 3:12 tells us none of us are good, no not one. Only God is perfect. No amount of our good works can ever pay for breaking the law of God.  Going to church, getting baptized, ‘repenting or turning from sin’, belonging to a certain religion, making promises to do better, none of these things are what we need to do to be saved. None of them can make us perfect ever in God’s sight. They are manmade works (even if a good thing to do), they are false to add as a requirement to the free gift of eternal life which we receive the moment that we believe Jesus Christ who is God, took our sins upon Him, paid the price in full, died and rose again in 3 days as He said He would. By taking His life back up again, He proved He is God, and had the victory over sin, death and the grave (1 Corinthians 15:50-57). He has told us who He is, and what He came to do. He came to seek and to save the lost. If you don’t know Him, you will forever separated from Him – Lost forever.

There is only one way to be saved. Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you WILL be saved. We will all die. He promises to give you everlasting life if you will believe alone upon the LORD Jesus Christ to save you, no other person can. No other religion can.  No works of your own can. He cares about you. Praying for you, Holly

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting lifeJohn 3:16

6 Responses to “Day 32 and counting

  • Holly, My thoughts and prayers are said and with you NOW as you are with your husband. May GOD bless HIm and YOU and give you strength. He sees how much you have been through. With LOVE in JESUS xx Sarah Jones xx

    • Thank you Sarah 🙂 I sure appreciate it. He is a man of sorrows acquainted with grief… Love in Him, Holly <3

  • God is near to the broken-hearted. Lord was ask for Your tender mercies, now and always.

  • Beth Matthieu
    6 years ago

    Beautifully written testimony. Jesus is our love and salvation. Love you Holly. Thinking of your whole family and always praying for you and Adam and now your hubby as well. i love you always. Beth Pulliam Matthieu

    • Beth, you are always so sweet. Love you too, hope I can see you soon. I saw Adam this morning before I went to the hospital, he was happy to see me. So was Jason 🙂 I love the Lord, He is so good to be with us in all these hard times, never forsaking us. Very hard to see all the grief and sorrow. Love you so much, hope your mom is doing well, tell her I send my love.

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